Monday Ministerial Musings
By Rev. Mark William Ennis
2023 Blog #14
April 3, 2023
Marriage is not Thanksgiving Dinner
My daughter got married on Saturday and I enjoyed it immensely. It was a day of celebration and it was a day of uniting family and friends for a joyous occasion. For three years of COVID we have not had very many things to celebrate and it was good to have happy festivities again.
A few people were a bit surprised when my daughter chose to have no one walk down the aisle with her or “give her away.” She must be a bit like her parents. We didn’t have anyone “give away” Pam either. She and I walked down the aisle together to be married in 1981.
My daughter also did not have me preside over the ceremony either. She chose to have a beloved professor from seminary perform the wedding. Some folks wondered why. I don’t know but that is OK. It was nice to be able to sit and enjoy the ceremony without being responsible for the event. I got to be the “father of the bride” first and a minister second. It doesn’t get much better than that.
I did conduct the service of Holy Communion. As part of that service both the groom’s father and I were two of those who distributed the elements. It was a joy and honor to serve the wedding party communion, especially my daughter and son-in-law who were having communion for the first time as a married couple.
Most people never get to see their mother’s wedding. My grandson did. This is a second marriage for my daughter. She and her husband included him in the ceremony as they promised to care for him and guide him all of his life. It was wonderful to see my grandson involved in the wedding and he relates well to my new son-in-law. This is a relief. His protection is one of my foremost priorities.
It was a fabulous day but I hope that this wedding is not a Thanksgiving dinner. What does a wedding have to do with Thanksgiving? Every year I enjoy Thanksgiving with family and friends. There are days and weeks of preparation but it is over in a few hours. The leftovers are gone within a week and the whole day is forgotten until the following fall.
I want this wedding to be forever, not over within a few hours or even a week. It is up to this new couple to put their full energy into making this marriage work but it is not only their responsibility. It is the responsibility of all of us to support and give our help in strengthening their marriage. Marriage is difficult and those of us who were part of the wedding must help them in their marriage.
Like Thanksgiving, a wedding takes a long time to prepare. Unlike Thanksgiving, a wedding is meant to last forever, not a few hours. We want all of our months of preparation to lead to a lifelong event. I pray that we all will work together to make this outcome happen.
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